Journey of the Immortal Cleric

Snakes, fog, a dancing vampire and Gojira! By Grumsh' withered eye!

Lets go find dese portals, she said.....

Da snake around da big tree talked to us in our heads. Him not know about portal, but him know about spear. Him say dat to get to da spear, we hafta go through trials no one else ever make it through! Dat sound like sometin right for me – I can add to my titles and fame wit dis done.

Da snake den turn into a small child. We got to walk dis kid through da pyramid to da other side, wit him not getting hurt. I hate guard missions like dis – da person you giardin usually does sometin dumb dat gets people killed. Hope dis snake-kid is smarter.

Da pyramid have all kinds of strange rooms. Each room seems to have no door, so we gotta find our way through. First room we broke da floor wit ice and strength. Second room fill wit strange white water dat turn into fog. Fog like drinking orc “white lightening” – too much of it and it make you all stupid, make you see blurry, and make you tink and see stuff dats not dere. Andrin too small – she have lots of trouble wit da fog. She start attackin tings dat not dere, and even some of us.

Da next room some elf-lovin fairy tale room – has doors, but we need to know da right one to go through by understandin some sappy love riddle ting. Sometin about da moon and a dead guy, den da dead guy get sacrificed to da sun (how you sacrifice da dead already?) and da sun not like it. Not a surprise dere – only dead gods like da dead sacrifice. Den a leopard come out, drag da dead guys head to da river, and some gator grab it and swim away. Me tink whole thing sappy elf love story. Me tink Feydran should figure out. Snake-kid no help at all. Sun, moon, angry lover (all orks are angry lovers), jungle cat, river – stupid story. We figure out it da moon, and go through dat door.

Next room got a coffin it in, made from a tree. Feydran sure it got walking dead in it, so him bless it by da power of Marduke. Dat just seem to anger da dead guy, but him get up and start doing some strange dance ting. Den him have 4 more people dancing wit him – and dey all us. Him dance pull our souls out! Da others do stuff – try to break up dance, try to cast magic at him, stuff like dat. Me tink him power come from coffin, so me try to smash coffin! Me jump on coffin, me throw coffin, me smash coffin. Andrin get weak and fall over. Me use my mergency strength giver to get her back on her feet, and Feydran help too. We finally break da coffin to twigs and stop da vampire from dancing, and we keep our souls. It was close – me thought him stupid dance gonna be da end of Kadmos! Me surely go to ork hell if me killed by stupid foppish dancing dead guy!

We go to da next room and it get worse. Da roof all have roots hanging from it – lots of big roots. Stuck in da roots is one big sleeping lizard! Him big thunder lizard like dat legend – gojira! Him swallow all us and not even know it. Stupid snake-boy say we hafta cross da room, usin da roots, but we cant hurt dem or da giant lizard wake up!

I ok wit swinging and climbing, but Andrin and Feydran not so good at it. Sylvus just become some big bird probably. Maybe he can carry da snake-boy.

I hope dis da last room, or da way tings going we hafta fight another god after this!



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